Mataupu
Holidays with friends with children: be careful when things get out of hand!
Yep, summer vacation is approaching. This year, we decided to go with friends and their children. After having booked the ideal vacation spot, we start to look at more logistical details, such as the rhythm of the days with the little ones and the meals. What if the holidays together became a real nightmare? How to do when the clash is inevitable? We take stock with Sidonie Mangin and her guide to surviving holidays with friends.
When the children are toddlers
At the start, Sidonie Mangin explains in her book, funny and in the end very realistic, that we all have good reasons to go with several couples with the children: our friends are nice, we will share the costs, and as we say more we are the merrier the more we laugh… There can also be darker reasons, such as escaping the face-to-face relationship between the couple alone with their toddlers, avoiding vacations with the in-laws, etc. However, leaving with children, especially when they are small, can quickly turn into general discomfort when things go wrong. The main risk is illness, which begins just when you leave or as soon as you arrive. “Childhood illnesses last exactly 15 days, during the holidays. They require very special attention: prohibition, for example, to expose yourself to the sun or to bathe. Great when you’re on vacation! », Specifies Sidonie Mangin. Other tensions that threaten the group: the whims of our adorable little blond heads. Depending on the education of each other, they have the right or not to roll on the ground at the slightest annoyance. Which can, of course, quickly annoy some. The way of life is the main point of disagreement between family and friends.
Different rhythms of life with children
The schedules, the food, the education that one gives to his cherub differ from one parent to another. And above all, everyone has their own habits: “He has the right to watch TV, he can eat ice cream …”. Sidonie Mangin explains that “the fixed hours or the hygiene rules imposed by certain parents can be sources of tension. There are those who continue to put their children to bed at fixed times while others let them stay up a little later ”. Eating habits are also a time bomb. According to the parents, some kids will have the right “exceptionally” to eat Nutella, candy or drink Coca-Cola at staggered hours. Inconceivable for others. “The ideal is to go with friends who have children of the same age, to live at the same pace. Regarding education, we must prioritize dialogue as much as possible to avoid argument ” explains Sidonie Mangin.
What to do when the argument is inevitable?
After days of unspoken, annoyance, angry details, the argument lies in wait for the most peaceful of friends. Strong or fleeting, the clash allows you to say everything you think. Sidonie Mangin indicates “the accumulation of tensions, small disturbing details or the sum of muffled criticisms can lead to an argument. Often it goes as quickly as it happened! In friendship as with everything, what matters is dialogue. Talking things to yourself is important. The solution ? Do not hesitate to take breaks during the day. Getting away from the group when it starts to get complicated can be beneficial. You don’t have to share everything all the time. You can also go for a break with the family, for a walk, for example ”. Another risk is that when children argue, adults have to try to find compromises. Here again, Sidonie Mangin gives some simple advice: “help them find common games even if they are not the same age. Avoid criticizing the education of friends. Look for the compromise to avoid differences in treatment from one child to another, and last advice, the most important: if all that does not work, make your child understand that all parents are different ”. Good holidays !